“Dating Violence Dangers” presentation made by mother of murdered 2001 Rockwall H.S. grad

Jennifer Pankz

(Click on photo to enlarge)

The mother of murdered 2001 Rockwall High School graduate Jennifer Pankz spoke this morning about “Dating Violence Dangers” to about 25 community leaders and volunteers gathered at Presbyterian Hospital of Rockwall for a meeting of the Rockwall County  Coalition Against Family Violence.

Her mother, Rowlett resident and former First Convenience Bank of Rockwall manager Tanya Pankz, told the audience that Jennifer was killed Dec. 27, 2002, by a boy she had been dating at the University of North Texas, where she had only been a student for one semester.

She explained that when Jennifer tried to break up with the boy and leave the apartment – after she learned that he was taking steroids – he grabbed her in a headlock, broke her neck and then slashed her throat with a knife. The Denton County coroner later confirmed that she died instantly when he broke her neck.

The murderer, Stephen Chartier, is now serving a 45-year prison sentence for murder, although he did escape a life sentence when he plea bargained and admitted his guilt. Consequently he will be eligible for parole after 22.5 years.

Pankz also showed a Fox 4 news video reporting about her daughter’s murder, in which she and her husband explained how devastating it has been to family and friends. Five of her friends from high school were also in attendance, and have volunteered to speak out about the dangers of dating violence, as well.

The still-grieving mother said she’ll never forget Jennifer’s last words to her on the phone, ironically asking whether the body of domestic violence victim Lacy Peterson had been found. Lacy’s husband was later convicted of her murder.

“Then Jennifer said she had something she had to go do, and ended her phone conversation with ‘Love ya mom.”

Pankz told the group that she later was surprised to learn that Jennifer was actually involved in a prior abusive relationship in high school, even though her daughter was raised in a loving, middle-class family “where this type of violence was not supposed to happen.”

She explained that she still does not understand why Jennifer was involved with not just one but two abusive, controlling males, but has concluded that there are just so many abusive young men that it is difficult for young women nowadays not to meet and date at least one.

“Recent research conducted in Texas reveals that over 50 percent of teens have either personally been or know someone who has been involved in dating violence,” she added.

The meeting was held to help kick off the resumed efforts of the Rockwall County Coalition Against Family Violence, spearheaded by the Lillian Smith Family Violence Foundation. The non-profit organization is devoted to increasing public education while promoting necessary changes in schools, governments, workplaces, churches and communities to reduce and prevent domestic violence, dating violence, sexual assaults and child abuse/neglect.

Foundation founder and president J.J. Smith, a Rockwall resident and himself a survivor, introduced Pankz and told the audience after her presentation that the Foundation will commit to identifying, promoting and bringing together all of the resources across Rockwall County and other counties so that each of the various organizations involved will know what each other is doing in the battle against relationship violence.

Comments were made by most everyone in attendance stating that they recognized the need to work more closely together and welcomed the Lillian Smith Foundation’s efforts to help.

Included in the audience were Dr. Gene Burton, Superintendent of Rockwall ISD Schools; Sheri Fowler, RISD Director of Communications; Presbyterian Hospital’s Social Services Director Ruth Thomas and Chaplain Bob Reeves; Rockwall Co. Sheriff’s Dept. Detective Vickie Oldham; Women In Need Women’s Shelter Director Roger Robertson; Women In Need’s Rockwall victim advocate Angie Glidewell; past president of the Rockwall Soroptimist’s Club Karen Straughan; community volunteer Marlyn Staggs; Rockwall and Dallas “Superlawyer” and newspaper columnist John Browning, plus several Lillian Smith Foundation members.

Another meeting will be scheduled within 2-3 weeks in the evening, Smith said, so that more people can hear Pankz speak about Dating Violence Dangers.

Over 200 people have clicked on the website and blog stories, thus far, and dozens have expressed interest in attending her presentation in the evening.

Today is the 50th anniversary of my abusive father murdering my mother

My mom, Lillian Smith

August 12, 2008. Today is the 50th anniversary of the death of my parents.

On Aug. 12, 1958, my abusive father was mistakenly released from a mental hospital in Pueblo CO, took a cab to Denver, broke into our small apartment during the early morning hours and then shot and killed my mother as she attempted to leave through the front door. After looking down at me cradling my dead mother’s head in my arms, he then raised the rifle to his head, pulled the trigger and committed suicide.

Although the years have faded my memory, it’s still clear enough that I’m sure I’ll never forget the scene. Right after he broke in through the back kitchen door, mom stood up from her sofa bed in the living room next to mine and said simply “I’m leaving.” His response was “Sit down,” to which she replied “I’m leaving.” After he commanded her three times to sit down, he pulled the trigger as she reached for the doorknob, shooting her three times in the head and chest. She collapsed to the floor, dying instantly.

I’ll never forget the painful look in his eyes just before he shot himself. What a miserable soul he was! He was diagnosed as a “paranoid schizophrenic,” but also was suffering from what we know call “post-traumatic stress syndrome,” after seeing so many men killed in battle in WWII. After my mother took me and left him two years earlier in Los Angeles, we had fled to Miami and then to Denver. But he always caught up and sent threats to her such as “I”m going to throw battery acid in your eyes and bury you alive.” He’d beaten her numerous times, in front of me, beginning when I was eight, and she finally decided that she wouldn’t take it anymore and left him. Lillian Smith was a brave woman, who refused to put up with his verbal and physical assaults. Of course, back then there were no women’s shelters so she had to make it on her own. She worked as a bank teller for several years to provide for us, leaving me with baby-sitters after school until she came home. She was a very loving, fun mom. Vivacious was a word people used to describe her. She was full of life and considerate to all, from my recollection. I remember her sister, my late aunt, saying once that Mom was never really cut out to be a mother. But I do know that my two older half-sisters and two older half-brothers also loved and appreciated her dearly.

Mom, I can’t wait to see you in heaven again. Gee, now that I’m 60 and my oldest sister will turn 80 this Sept, it may not be all that long before we all do reunite. The desire to see her again someday has driven me my entire life, and been largely responsible for my desire and interest in religion. I know that to see her I needed to find God first. I’m so grateful that I have.